Stand and chuck it out the window! Eric has become Slow Gland and Van should be delivering for Morrison’s!

What a load of rubbish!

Inexorably bad, contrived, cynical, amateurish – apart from some of the riffs, but there’s nothing new there either. A shamefully conspiracy theory blues bash at a time most of the world is going into a Yuletide lock-down.

Just old, cold and useless.

And is that what two of our greatest rock ‘n’ rollers have become too?

Well, Van the Very Awkward Man wrote the lyrics to what is being described as the world’s first anti Covid lock-down protest song … and it is so easy it made me feel green (vomitously green).

For a long time Van has been decrying social distancing at live concerts as “Pseudo-Science” – but seriously Van:

“ I don’t wanna be a pauper
And I don’t wanna be a prince
I don’t wanna be a pauper
And I don’t wanna be a prince
I just wanna do my job
Playing the blues for friends”

What’s that got to do with Covid!

And now – he becomes the conspiracy theorist, sounding bit like Adam Ant as an MP:

“Stand and deliver
You let them put the fear on you
Slow down the river
But not a word of it was true
If there’s nothing you can say
There may be nothing you can do

Stand and deliver
Stand and deliver
Dick Turpin wore a mask too.”

Did he? Poor old Dick!

I get the point though …and it would be brilliant if you were 14 Van and doing a school essay – but you are a rock of ages and ‘could do better!’

And what are you doing Eric, coming along for the ride?

I think you’ve just hidden your own glittering career behind a mask of complete pointlessness.

Here are the lyrics and here is the song – please tell us what you think!

Stand and deliver
You let them put the fear on you
Stand and deliver
But not a word you heard was true
But if there’s nothing you can say
There may be nothing you can do

Do you wanna be a free man
Or do you wanna be a slave?
Do you wanna be a free man
Or do you wanna be a slave?
Do you wanna wear these chains
Until you’re lying in the grave?

I don’t wanna be a pauper
And I don’t wanna be a prince
I don’t wanna be a pauper
And I don’t wanna be a prince
I just wanna do my job
Playing the blues for friends

Magna Carta, Bill of Rights
The constitution, what’s it worth?
You know they’re gonna grind us down, ah
Until it really hurts
Is this a sovereign nation
Or just a police state?
You better look out, people
Before it gets too late

You wanna be your own driver
Or keep on flogging a dead horse?
You wanna be your own driver
Or keep on flogging a dead horse?
Do you wanna make it better
Or do you wanna make it worse?

Stand and deliver
You let them put the fear on you
Slow down the river
But not a word of it was true
If there’s nothing you can say
There may be nothing you can do

Stand and deliver
Stand and deliver
Dick Turpin wore a mask too

#vanmorrison #clapton #slowhand #covid