Why hasn’t the Penny dropped you old shocker Rod?

He struts his dad-dance stuff on a Zimmer-man frame and lusts after an ex at 76

The Penny just hasn’t dropped has it Rod! Strutting like a cross between an ageing peacock and Max Wall, sounding like Leggin’ Flip and doing a bit of dad hand-jiving doesn’t cut it any more...

And ‘nicking’ the essence of an ancient Bob Dylan song makes you a bit of a t*t – not a hit!

Okay, okay I don’t dislike Rod and I’ve seen him in concert a number of times. He is a consummate performer.

I’m just poking a bit of fun at him really. But with One More Time as a comeback song, I think he’s made a number of mistakes … not only with his missus, but with his mate and his image.

Surely, when you’ve been having relationship problems with your ‘special constable’ very beautiful, much younger wife, you shouldn’t write about an ex-lover and how you wish to… well go back there.

You taught me how to nasty in those naughty high heel shoes,

The Devil wears Prada
We were lovers for a while, but it all came crashing down
The sex was immense, by a good old country mile
Make no mistake, you’ll always be on speed dial, oh yeah

I’ll say it for you Rod… sorry Penny! I think with those lines PC Penny might just decide you’ve reached your cell-by date again.

And a word of advice, don’t do Dad Dancing in a video either (or anywhere actually). You have more class than that Rod! Playing air drums as you walk down the street in your old regimental jacket makes you look like a wind-up doll on the way to some bawdy cenotaph to geriatric sex!

Also, don’t almost plagiarise ol’ Bob to get another hit – come on, you can do better.

And it’s not the first time is it Rod?

Your management team had to contact Dylan‘s people about Forever Young, when you borrowed the title and some of the lyrics – and Dylan request a portion of the royalties.

Then Brazilian musician Jorge Ben Jorge said that Rod’s 1979 No. 1 hit “Do Ya Think I’m Sexy?” plagiarized portions of his song “Taj Mahal.” The two settled out of court, and in his 2012 autobiography, Stewart admitted to “unconscious plagiarism.”

There was John Lennon too who said, about Don’t Let Me Down “Rod Stewart turned that into ‘[Georgie] don’t go-o-o.’ That’s one the publishers never noticed.” Indeed, the second part of Stewart’s The Killing of Georgie song sounds a lot like Lennon’s classic track.

Plagiarism happens in music – often by accident. Sometimes it’s “unconscious borrowing”, other times it’s a “musical homage”.

For instance Led Zepplin were taken to task after the intro to their 1971 hit, Stairway To Heaven, was accused of bearing a striking resemblance to US psych-rockers Spirit’s 1968 instrumental, Taurus.

But a judge decided that the songs  bore “no substantial similarity” to each other.

One of the most famous ones was when George Harrison‘s  My Sweet Lord which had a strong resemblance to a 1962 hit by the US girl group The Chiffons, He’s So Fine. Oops.

Oasis  had a big hit in the summer of 1994 with their single Shakermaker, but it wasn’t long before people pointed out that the opening line was similar to the song I’d Like To Teach The World To Sing.

And Bob’s not escaped the arrows of this kind of misfortune either.

Dylan released Love & Theft back in 2001, it was hailed as one of many returns to form in his career. People spotted conservatively edited chunks of text which were uncredited and from a book so niche that few knew about it.

On another occasion Joni Mitchell once churlishly said: “Bob Dylan is not authentic at all. He’s a plagiarist and his name and voice are fake. Everything about Bob is a deception. We are like night and day, he and I.”

So back to Rod, just have a listen to the intros to both these songs … how similar do you think they are? The words too have a similar sentiment …

#bobdylan #rodstewart #onemoretime #mammayoubeenonmymind #rock #penny