Surely, one of the best things in life is to be able to tell your child that you love them … to let them know that you care and that you will always be there to protect them.
Then something awful happens and you split from your wife or husband and one way or the other you move into another life … a life that is alien to you. You become the absent parent.
And at first you have heartbreak … heartbreak for the whole family. But your own heartbreak is all the greater because you are the parent who can no longer kiss your son or your daughter good night every night as they go to bed and to their own land of young dreams.
But you also know that your child is suffering because they miss you – a massive part of their life is basically standing at the window looking in, waving and then walking away. Secretly all your child sees is you walking away.
So, you know it is your job to re-assure them, make them feel safe, cared for, wanted, loved even though now you live across town or in a different part of the world.
But you can re-assure them and tell them how much they are loved by telephone, by letter, on your access days or simply by a gesture or a look.
Then something happens … something beyond comprehension.
You are advised by the people who are supposedly there to help heal rifts between families, to protect the sanctity of parental love, that you must no longer tell your child you love them …
Yes, here at the preservationsociety we are hearing real-life horror stories of estranged parents who are being told that displays of affection are putting your child in danger of emotional damage.
Tell us at the preservationsociety if this has happened to you – when we have enough we will approach Cafcass and other organisations and face them with the facts.
We will publish their response.
#cafcass #children #family #loveban #wordstoneverspeak
Roxane Clay
Told not to tell my daughter she is beautiful because it will go to her head and be my fault. Still make me ill
Stuart Aiken
my psycho complained.to her solicitor who complained.to my solicitor who advised me to mind my ps and qs ,
Mike Henstridge
I’ve been told I’m not allowed to say I’m their dad in any emails I send, because if I do she won’t let the kids read them.
Daniela Gullotti
i was advised by social services to tell my 3 children i will when i am told too.
James Breeden
I never will
Andrew John Teague
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Leigh G Banks this week is childrens mental health week
There is a how to avoid your childrens mental health
Its surprising how many things that avoid childrens mental health absent parents can do that would help avoid
Forgotten children indeed
Things like always let your child know they are loved
Listen to your child
Encourage your child
And many more
Family courts especially cafcass and guardian lawyers
Are a fucking joke
Stuart Monkman
Yer Cafcass stopped me saying it in my indirect contact said it was causing them emotional harm
Declan McCaffrey
I was told because my ex complained in court only last week that “dad was being very forceful saying I love you to the boys via the phone” my solicitor who’s not a dad dad said lay off that as it seems very unnatural as he wouldn’t say it go his nephew 😩 I was stunned….right up until Christmas my boys were saying it freely to me over the phone at the end of our chats, then boom it stops, it’s something I’ve said to my boys since they were small babies, so there you go, mum complains solicitors agree dad shouldn’t say he loves his boys! Hell on earth
My own children have told me to stop telling them that I love them and have blocked my number and on social media.
it is important for your kids to know that you will always love them, even from a distance if necessary. love is eternal.
They sent our 6 yr old to an adult psych ward for 12 days because she wouldn’t stop screaming for me and then they tell me it’s because we’re too close and I’m too affectionate and need to back off