No, we aren’t black-heart monsters – we are victims, just like our children
Looking at the life of a bloke who met a woman, had a child in love, then lost everything to hatred
“Parental Alienation Awareness Day is just around the corner and do you know, I am sick to death of being thought of as a dead-beat dad.
It’s a killer.
So, how did I become a dead-beat dad?
Well, what I did was walk away from a totally toxic relationship after seven years of trying to get things right. Then discovered I was being cuckolded too.
The majority of people in this world who have had to end a relationship where a child is involved – the only good thing perhaps to have come out of those years together – knows it’s not easy.
It is certainly the hardest decision you will make in your life, believe me.
Still, today though, I believe our child was conceived in love. It was our world that went wrong, not our child, she did nothing wrong. So, why was she punished?
That is the tragedy.
When my ex was pregnant I supported her financially on a monthly basis… I voluntarily paid for my child before she was born…
Two years after she arrived on this earth – me and her mum had broken up ‘for good’ times but got back together because of our commitment.
But by then – the unholy campaign to paint me as a dead-beat, a cheat, a liar, a thief, a benefits fraudster and an alcoholic and drug addict, began.
Three vicious – I would say psychotic – wives (my ex and two of her very nice middle-class lady friends) conspired against me. Three bitter and bored neighbours in a middle-class British leafy dormitory decided to collude against me.
I became the totem of hatred for everything they saw as bad that had happened to them in their lives.
They phoned my boss to tell him he was ‘employing scum’, they tried to get me banned from local pubs because, they said ‘he doesn’t pay for his child ‘cos he spends ll his money in here!’.
And they hid my daughter from me, literally. They physically turned her face away from me if we came near each other accidently on the streets.
Yep, there are dead-beat dads – those who refuse to step up to the mark – but that isn’t me, nor is it any of the thousands of male victims of parental alienation we have been involved with other the past decade.
PA is an inhuman abuse of human rights and it affects men, women and children alike.
Yes, it is a family killer.
Do you know, suicide is the biggest ‘cull’ of men under the age of 45 in the UK?
Every day we must remind ourselves that parental alienation remains a deadly secret all over villages, small towns and cities across the world.
But now us victims have our own day, Parental Alienation Awareness Day.
So, let’s use it to tell the world our stories … the date us April 25 2023
PAAD is a major part of a global awareness campaign aimed at making the general public, judges, police officers, mental health care workers, child protection agencies, lawyers and social workers aware of one of the biggest unchecked crimes in the world today.
They all need to remember – just like the rest of the world – that we’ve all been through break-ups. And in fury we’ve all grabbed at, metaphorically speaking, the nearest ‘blunt instrument’ to get back at our ex, make him/her suffer and make them know what they losing by leaving us.
But the weapon you chose should never be your child.
Using your child as a weapon of crass destruction is horrific life-changing child abuse, psychological abuse. It is selfish, cynical and shameful.
Ask yourself one question … how can you possibly claim to love your son or daughter when you brain-wash them into insulting, attacking, abusing – or even just ignoring – their other parent?
If you abuse your own children for your own satisfaction and to punish somebody else, what kind of human being are you?
Ask yourself that question and answer it honestly. Face yourself in the mirror of your child’s heartbreak.
That reflection, if you look deeply into yourself, will show that you are no better than the family courts, child maintenance organisations, CAFCASS and social workers.
These are the organisations that work rarely for the child but almost always work for the bitter, dispossessed and dumped ex.
Yes, you are the parent with care but the simple fact is, if you are an exponent of parental alienation, you truthfully and honestly DO NOT care.
And still today it is difficult to get the world to notice you and what you and the courts are doing…
We, at The Society, along with Andrew John Teague, from NAAP and D.A.D.s. have been fighting for almost a decade to get things put right. So far, we haven’t reached the end of the road.
And we’ll both keep going.”
The idea for PAAD was introduced in Canada by Sarvy Emo in late 2005.
#parentalalienation #children #families #courts #cafcass #socialworkers #SarvyEmo
PA is a beat down enough already than to add to it further and propagate their language on everyone. How can calling everyone ‘dead-beats’ in any be considering a morale boost? How can excluding alienated mothers empower us all to come together like we are supposed to? The term dead-beat has been used primarily to describe dads. At any rate, this is not a sentiment that will inspire anyone. In fact, quite the opposite, I believe its intent is to demoralize and to diminish our resolve. It’s no different than saying, “Hey, POS, stand up and be counted”??? Come on. Remove or revise this post to be something positive, encouraging and inspirational. As it stands, it fails to do so. It fails target parents and it fails our children.
Hi thanks for your comment … this is a validation of all of us who have been called dead-beats … it says categorically that dead-beat is a massive attack … sorry you misread it. I have spent almost a decade campaigning for our rights and know what the awfulness of the situation is brutally well
Cheers
Leigh